I hate veggie burgers.
Roo hates veggie burgers.
I think this is why we get along so well. Well that and our love of cookie dough.
But lately I’ve been curious about making a meatless burger.
For me to even admit that, to the one reader I have (Hello, self!) is a bit of a feat. Yes, I’m probably exaggerating, but I love the dramz*. And by dramz, I don’t mean “the situation.” Which, by the way, I 1. hate myself for knowing that catch phrase/title (that sound hear right now is my soul crying), 2. did Abercrombie really pay him to not wear his clothing? Can I also be labeled “bad for the brand,” and be paid?, and 3. Yes, I like CBS news (although I don’t know what this “Celebrity Circuit” crap is). It’s right before Matlock. Or Columbo. Or…
Ramblings aside, it’s taken a lot for me to think about beans. In a burger. And it tasting delicious.
Having been scarred by all the commercial ones that tasted akin to a cardboard box that previously housed ten cats, I knew I didn’t want it to have ingredients similar to this. And if you happen to love those, well, just you wait, I have found you something better.
Thankfully a lot of the….vegan world, has been all about making a homemade meatless burger. So there were many, many recipes to look at, judge, make snarky comments about, to my only audience at the time, the cat that loves paper bags more than me,
laugh shrilly, because I was still in disbelief that my life of loving thinly sliced, right on the diagonal, grilled flank steak, appears to be coming to an end (not really), and then picked one. Sometimes a girl is manic about choosing the right meatless burger. Most often times not.
*One of the words I’m obnoxiously trying to get going again. But not fetch. Never fetch.
Recipe Adapted, a little, from Oh She Glows
Makes Six Large Burgers
1 onion, diced
1 large garlic clove, minced
Olive Oil (about a tablespoon) for sauteing the onion and garlic
2 large egg whites
1 cup oats, processed into flour (I used old fashioned oats)
One and a half cups bread crumbs (I pulsed two end pieces of whole wheat Pepperidge Farm bread in a food processor)
1 cup grated carrots
1 cup cooked black beans, mashed up (I pulsed them in the food processor)
Half cup of slivered almonds, toasted
1 tablespoon Olive Oil (for the burgers themselves)
1 tablespoon reduced sodium tamari (you can use reduced sodium soy sauce)
One and a half teaspoon chili powder
1 teaspoon cumin
1 teaspoon dried oregano
Salt to taste (I used half teaspoon coarse sea salt, and I use Diamond)
Another couple tablespoons of olive oil for pan frying your burgers
A large saute pan
A food processor (optional)
A large mixing bowl
A small mixing bowl
Add one tablespoon of olive oil to the large saute pan and place over medium heat. When the oil begins to shimmer, add the onions and cook until lightly browned. Add the garlic and cook until fragrant (about 30 seconds to one minute). Remove from heat and let cool for about five minutes.
Add all other ingredients (egg whites to tamari) except spices and salt to a large mixing bowl. Scrape the onions and garlic with a spatula, into the large mixing bowl. Wipe the large saute pan clean with a paper towel (or if you must, clean it) for use later. Mix the ingredients in the large bowl until combined. Add spices and salt to the ingredients in the large bowl. Mix until combined.
Start making the patties. Grab a handful of batter and flatten with palms of your hand. Don’t be afraid to pat them tightly so they hold together.
Add about a tablespoon of olive oil (or basically enough to coat the pan) to the saute pan that you used for sauteing the onions and garlic with. Place on a burner over medium heat. Pan fry the burgers until they’re browned, about five to seven minutes on each side.
Serve on my favorite, brioche buns, with sliced tomato. It’s kind of epic.