I have this fear. A completely irrational fear that only an obsessive planner, type A, control freak like myself could only come up with.
I’m afraid that I’m going to be a “Crunchy Mom.”
To me, a “Crunchy Mom” is basically one who strives to have their family live clean (like chemical free), healthy lives.
And what’s wrong with this?
Well, two things, 1) I’m not married and 2) I’m not pregnant.
I should have no concerns about this whatsoever. (I told you, it’s completely irrational.)
But after watching this You Tube spoof on Shit Girls Say (if you haven’t seen the original yet, where have you been!?), I couldn’t help but relate to what those women were saying.
For instance, I saw Business of Being Born. Again, I’m not even pregnant. I don’t know why the film called out to me from our Netflix queue, but it did, and I watched it.
And I liked it.
I found it super informative, even though I’m slightly traumatized from watching Ricki Lake give birth on film. Gone are the memories of Ricki prancing around on set in her oversized blazers during the opening credits. Instead, vagina.
I also rationalize a $20 maple syrup purchase from Whole Foods. (Because it’s Grade B. Of course.)
I love coconut oil and I have asked Roo if my shirt “shows my back fat.” The two may be related.
And while I don’t hush Roo so that I can focus on “my kegels,” (No.) a lot of this looks scarily foreseeable.
When I explained all of this to Roo (because he made the mistake of asking me, “what’s on your mind, Babe?”), he knew what to do.
He listened, “I mean, am I going to have a ‘Chicken Pox Party?’ My mom took me to one of those when I was a kid, and we all know how I’m going to turn into my mother.”
He smiled, “And I love full fat stuff. LOVE.”
He sat me down, “I’m just so….I don’t know. Everyone is having babies! My Facebook newsfeed is basically telling me to have babies.”
And put this in front of me.
*I feel totally better.
Continue Reading For Recipe